Everyone calls them Amazing, I just call them my daughters.

“I Just Call You Mine”

I pinch myself sometimes to make sure I'm not in a dream
That's how it seems
I close my eyes and breathe in the sweetest moments I've ever known
It feels like home
And here I am I want to be your everything
There you are
Turning winter into spring

And everyone that sees you
Always want's to know you
And everyone that knows you
Always has a smile
You're standing ovation after years of waiting
For a chance to finally shine
Everyone calls you amazing
Yeah
I just call you mine

I fall apart
Just a word from you just somehow
seems to fix
Whatever's wrong
Oh, you reach into the weakest moments
And remind me that I'm strong
You've got to know
I'd be a fool not to see you even worse
To forget that you're more than I deserve

Cause everyone that sees you
Always want's to know you
And everyone that knows you
Always has a smile
You're standing ovation after years of waiting
For a chance to finally shine
Everyone calls you amazing
Yeah
I just call you mine

Nothing makes sense when you're not here
As if my whole world disappears
Without you what's the point of it

Cause everyone that sees you
Always want's to know you
And everyone that knows you
Always has a smile
You're the dream that I've been chasin' after years of waiting
For a chance to finally shine
Everyone calls you amazing
I just call you mine
Everyone calls you amazing
I just call you mine

Song dedicated to Akalaya and Ellie.
I love you my girls.

Picture perfect!!!!

A smile so big she looks like she could laugh

The smile that looks like she could just talk your ear off about something.

The satisfied happy smile.

That beautiful glow of happiness she has in her face when she looks at you.

I've waited for 11 months to capture this photo and I finally did. This is our Ellie's smile the smile that brightens the room, makes the clouds go away and the sun shine. The smile that feels my heart with love and joy. I was so happy to finally capture this.. Definitely plan on framing it. Ellie is such a bubbly, emotional little sweet heart. I'm blessed she's my daughter and even though she's only a few months old I'm so very proud of her already. Lord knows I will always love my boys. But there's something special daughters bring into your life and I have too. This picture perfect smile reminds me to slow down and enjoy life. The picture perfect smile.

Comparison of the bond Akalaya and Elijah.

These are photos of Akalaya with Elijah at a very young age. Again you can see a bond between them and that bond is still there over miles and miles. Akalaya still talks about Elijah asks about him and even makes things for him all the time... She loves her baby brother very much.

A bond that can't be brocken...

Every parent often fears how things will be for there kids when a new baby arrives in the family and like every parent my fear was for all three of our boys. Mainly for my oldest due to his sensory. But much to my surprise the connection between our youngest daughter and oldest son is amazing. I sat and watched these too connect here in the dinning room floor while I was cleaning the twins up from lunch. Elijah loves his sister so very much and these photos show exactly how. I'm so glad to see there connection and love how protective Elijah is over his sister. These photos remind me of a time when Akalaya did the same thing with Elijah, Leaned over and stared at her brother. Moments like this are so rare and fleeting... I'm so glad I actually caught a photo of it.

I don't know how you do it?

So I'm often asked or hear the comment " I don't know how you do it!" or " How do you do it?" When referring to our kids and the close ages.The thought that often comes to mind is either" Because I have to" or "On a wing and a prayer." More often the " On a wing and a prayer" comment. Definitely a lot of prayer.

From the outside we often look like a well constructed and put together family. Our children often seem very calm and well behaved. Our house organized and fairly clean.But people often don't see the other side of things. The things that make the comments and questions other people ask and say seem like very logical comments and questions.

Days like today!!!! The morning started normal, busy as always. But as the day seemed to progress it become more evident this was definitely a Monday. After a long wait, we found out we were denied for a car loan. We searched other options with no luck, after finding the perfect mini van for us, if there is such a thing. Anyways then after the horrible let down of our inability to get a vehicle until probably July, I decided Sonic was a good food item for depression. So we go up to get the kids and serve there supper and much to our dismay we found Mathias playing in his poop, despite our attempt to prevent this by duct taping the diaper on. Too bad we can't do this around the legs!!! Would probably leave a rash. But none the less playing in his poop. Josh and I worked together to clean him up. After that we went to Sonic. We got there and things seemed to be going our way, we got an extra soda and didn't have to pay for it. Score!!!!!

We got home and thank God Ellie slept so we could eat. Ya the Monday came back into the day. Even my depression food was ruined. Josh's hamburger had stuff that we requested not be put on it, my hamburger looked like someone stepped on part of it and Josh's corn dog was burnt. Okay so ya know shrugging that off we proceeded to put the kids down for bed, a bit late but none the less down for bed. Ya!!! Adriel had played in his poop and smeared it all over his high chair. Then to make matters worse, Josh remembered he left our upstairs window open without a screen in it, in the twins room. So I frantically ran upstairs to prevent Mathias, who Josh had turned loose moments before, to find him standing in the toy box dangling partially out the window saying "who who". I jerked him back in and quickly closed the window. Collapsed on the floor and proceeded to have a heart attack. After recoving from the heart attack. I decided to come back down stair and try to take a break. Again Monday reared it's ugly head again. The baby has colic..... Thus ends this blog so I can pace the baby. To be truthful reading all the events of our Monday. I don't know how I do it!!!!!! Definitely alot of prayer.

Less then the best, not quiet proffesional, but who we are.

The other day we made an attempt at a nice photo of me with the boys and Ellie.We thought since the twins were sleepy it would work well, we found out pretty quick it wouldn't. After several failed attempts the above is what we got. The photos reminded me of something you would see from a old black and white comedy reel or possibly the photos you would put with the nursery rhyme about the old women in the shoe. We all had fun though and if the kids ever ask why there wasn't more photos of all of us together, I can definitely explain why with the above. Go figure, I should of known with a 4 year old, two 2 year olds and an infant we wouldn't be successful. So this weekend we will be going to let the professionals fight with it *lol*. The kewl part is they have more time, specialize in it and if they don't give us a successful photo, they don't get paid. So we will see what happens. We are hoping for a gorgeous photo... But I won't sit my hopes too high and will love whatever we can get. Because a perfect family photo, doesn't always reflect the true family. But photo's like the ones taken above reflect all of our kids unique attitudes and personality. I should frame these and put them up on our wall as a border. Make a cute border and get some laughs.

The one who made me a Mom.

The other day I recieved this photo of my oldest daughter Akalaya. I was truely amazed to see how much she's grown from that bubbly four year old I use to know, to this beautiful little women I know today.Akalaya is a straight A student, is sassy, sweet, and caring. She wants to be a vet and wears her heart on her sleeve. Anyone who knows Akalaya would agree, when Akalaya walks in a room she shines. Since the day she was born Akalaya has always been my only sunshine. She makes the world brighter for anyones life she touches.Unfortunately I'm unable to be with her but carry her in my heart everyday she will never truely know how much she means to me and how thankful I am she's my daughter.

But thankfully Josh and I are able to influence parts of her everyday life even from a distance away. Grandma was telling me the other day that Akalaya would often ask who I was as a little girl and seemed to wanted to be like me. As a Mom I feel honored that my girl wants to be like her Mommy. It's every Mommies dreams. I just hope she leaves out the bad parts. It also amazes me how forgiving she is. I've not seen her in four years and did some stupid things when I was younger that will effect her for the rest of her life, but she doesn't love me any less for it. I'm not there with her and she often will say " Your the greatest Mommy in the world". Comments like this really make me feel good, it may sound funny and though she's only a kid. This one small comment left a smile on my face for the rest of the day.It seems like when I talk to her if I make a suggestion, "Like she needs to sleep in her room", she seems to follow it. I'm glad in a little way I'm able to help raise her, and Grandma is doing a great job with her too.

I don't know why God gave me this precious little gift, especially since I didn't treasure it to start with. But I'm glad he did. Akalaya is the one who gave me the title of Mom. She is my oldest and there is a special place in my heart that will always be hers. Akalaya in a sense saved me from myself. I thought I knew what I wanted to be or what I wanted to do with my life and though she came at a bad time she truly showed me what I wanted to be, a Mom. I didn't realize it to start out with, because I was too immature but I realize it today.

I fell in love with her the moment I heard her heartbeat and that love only grew stronger as time went along. The day she was born I can still remember that it felt like there was no one else in the room but me and her. I remember just being amazed by this little bundle of joy lying across the room from me in a little plastic bed. I was terrified and didn't know how I could be a Mom. I was so young and just a kid myself, how was I going to raise one, but look at her today.
My daughter.
The one who made me a Mom.

Thank you Akalaya.

A Dramatic Check up.

So I took Adriel and Mathias to there 2 year check - ups and lets just say that was an adventure. They no longer fit in there strollers so I had to attach kid leashes to them to keep up with them. Adriel was not impressed with the leash, he would try to walk further then the leash would allow, when he discovered that he couldn't go as far as he would like he plopped down on the ground and proceeded to have a temper tantrum. Mathias on the other hand didn't seemed fazed by it, he would go to the end of the kid leash and just pull harder. I just laughed the whole time. It was better then crying. Though I'm sure everyone in the waiting room at the doctors office thought I was crazy. I was laughing while Adriel was sprawled out on the ground crying and Mathias was bouncing back and forth on the end of the kid leash like a ping pong ball. Thank God they took us back quickly. At least I thought that initially.

We got back to the waiting room and I thought it would be smooth sailing from there. Not so much the moment we walked through the door after there weight and height both the boys just started screaming. I was instructed to strip them down to diapers and lets just say that was a challenge. While stripping Adriel down Mathias was trying to cling to me and while stripping down Mathias Adriel was climbing up me. They screamed through out the whole appointment. They finally calmed down, but go figure it was right before the shot. The shots were administered and they cried for a few minutes and that was it. Ironically enough they cried more waiting for the shots then they did after them. They were fine after a few minutes of cuddling. We got our stuff together and left. Lets just say at times I felt like a shepherd herding a small flock of sheep.

Thank goodness both of the boys health wise are fine!!!
Adriel is 29 lbs and 34 inches tall.
Mathias is 28 lbs and 34 inches tall.

Boy amazing to think that once upon a time.
Adriel was 4 lbs.
Mathias was 3lbs 12 oz.

This was definietly a dramatic appointment and all that drama for one stick lol...

The Twins Easter.

The twins were by far the funniest to watch hunt for Easter eggs. After 2 fun failed attempts at decent photos of the twins with Josh and I. We decided to go upstairs and let the hunt begin.

Due to it being dark outside when we did the twins egg hunt and again Washington's wonderful wet weather we decided to do the Easter egg hunt inside. We choose to do it upstairs so our baby girl could nap downstairs and not be disturbed by the excited noisiness of the hunt. The twins quickly attacked the eggs that were scattered out all over the hall and our bedroom floor. They had fun trying to figure out what to do with them.

Adriel didn't really know what to do with the eggs. He would pick some up and run around with them vigrously shake them, toss them down and grab a few more. He didn't seem to notice his basket nicely sitting at the base of our bed waiting for him. We tried to spur his interest by digging in and showing him toys. But he had no interest and kept on picking up and throwing down eggs. He did have fun though and it was cute to watch.

Mathias on the other hand quickly gather a few and figured out how to open them and spent time opening each one. Thankfully he didn't realize that the items hidden in the eggs were candy and just mainly played with them. From time to time Mathias would get up and toss the eggs down the stairs, run back to his pile and throw more down the stairs. Mathias to our excitement also blurted out " egg" several times. Mathias also would shake the egg to hear it make noise and then kiss the top of the egg. Mathias much like his brother showed no interest in his basket, though when prompted stole an egg out of the basket leaving everything else in the basket just to sit and shake the one egg he snatched from the basket.

It was very cute to watch them run around excitingly gathering eggs. It was very funny and interesting to see how there interest changed from last year. I enjoyed watching them dig in and have fun and though it was a lot of work I enjoyed it. It turned out to be a wonderful Easter. We all had fun and went to bed with full happy tummies.

Elijah's Easter.

We sat Elijah's basket up in his corner. We had wanted to sit his basket and egg search up outside but unfortunately the weather wouldn't permit this. So we made due and hid eggs in the house.

Elijah thankfully loved his basket and dug in not leaving one item in the basket untouched. Then off to the egg search. We hid eggs in his corner and in the dinning room.

He looked for them high and low and proudly as shown in the above photo found everyone of them. He was really excited to open each one and see what was inside. It took Elijah a whole 10 minutes to find everything and be done searching. He had fun though..

Ellie's First Easter.

Ellie of course couldn't really do much for Easter. But we still made her up a basket and dressed her up like we did the boys. She looked beautiful in her dress. Daddy got it for her, her basket was filled with a new outfit for this winter, her first dress shoes, her first bunny and very first book. She looked like a precious little doll.

She of course wouldn't keep her shoes on, but for what time they were on they looked beautiful on her. Not a very exciting Easter for her. She spent most of it sleeping =-) .

Our Hodges Family Easter.

Elijah's Basket

Adriel's Basket

Mathias's Basket

Ellie's Basket

This Easter is the Josh and I's 6th family Easter. Yes even our 1st in "2005" was a family Easter. I was pregnant with Elijah. Anyways this Easter went like many before it. Josh and I spent the weekend preparing everything for Easter. Josh prepared the meal and I prepared the Easter baskets for the kids. I made up 4 baskets, one for each kid and Josh prepared Ham, deviled eggs, stuffing, green beans and much more. Our fridge is packed full of leftovers and the meal was wonderful. The baskets were gorgeous.

Mommy and Mathais's outing.

So Mathias and I went out together. The first time I have taken him out by himself just to go out,shop and hang out. The only other time I've taken him out is to doctors appointments. I was so excited to take him out by himself, I wanted to see who he was without his brother around, that and he seemed like he was feeling ignored. So I accomplished two things at once. Anyways we had fun, it was cute to hear him talk to everything. When we left to go to the store he even blurted out "car go bye". I loved to hear him say that. I love my goo so much, think I will be doing this alot more.

Check ups!!! Oh My!!!!!

So March 31st was Elijah and Ellie's well baby check up. I was nervous about taking them out together, though I had did it the weekend before with no troubles. But this was to a check - up, with shots involved. I was more concerned about Elijah and being unable to hold him down for the shots, especially with a baby.

So Elijah was the first one to get checked out and to get shots. The check up went well, he stood on the scale happily and got his height measured with no problem. The finger stick to test his iron level was another story. He screamed and kicked and loudly pleaded with the nurse " Don't stick me". After the stick he was fine for a while until they came in with the needles for his shots. He willingly got on the table but I'm sure he would of done otherwise if he knew what was coming. They had to call in another nurse to hold his top half while the nurse on the bottom half stabbed him with the needles. Normally with Elijah I'm fine when he cries, but I almost cried this time with his shots. He was just begging so pitifully " No more pokes, No more pokes." But as much as I didn't like it, I know it's whats best for him and all and all he did well, he even got a sucker and sticker after all was said and done. I was amazed to see how much he had grown from his last check - up. He's now 38lbs and 41 inches tall. Amazing he started out at 7lbs 12 oz and 21 inches long. They grow so fast!!!

Ellie was the second to get her check - up. Of course hers was less dramatic and alot quicker, also less painful. They weighed her and gave her one tiny shot, which she screamed about but quickly recovered, of course with help from big brother. It was so cute to see Elijah showing Ellie his boo boos and reassuring her " The doctor is gone now sis no more pokes, I will protect you." Ellie of course has also grown quiet a bit and now weighs 8lbs 11oz and is 21 inches long. My precious babies are growing so fast.

My sweet Elijah bug and Ellie Belly Bugga Boo.....

Down The Stairs We Go and Easter Crafts.

So today is the day that the boys developmental teacher comes out to work with them and after our normal initial introduction we got to work on some of the things the boys need to be learning and working on. One of those things is learning how to come down the stairs. After there teacher working with them and a another developmental specialist showed me how to encourage them to come down the stairs and the appropriate way to do it Adriel surprised us all. After only a few times of showing him how to come down the stairs, he took off and did it all on his own and quiet quickly too. I am so proud of him. They are making improvements very quickly an improvement I am happy about.

After working on going up and down the stairs we did Easter crafts. The twins sat and panted paper eggs with special kid safe painting pens and Elijah did a special big boy craft. I was delighted to see how uniquely each child did there own crafts. Mathias spent more time eating the paint pens then actually painting on the paper eggs. Adriel dug right in and painted 5 different paper eggs. Elijah of course enjoyed his craft and worked at it diligently. I am in hopes that each child while make great strides. Though at different rates hopefully at a more acceptable rate physically, developmentally and academically. With plenty of work, several more arts and crafts and lots of flash cards I know my boys will be back on track before we know it.

Our Goo said "moo".

Much to my dismay last week I was told the twins are developmentally behind. They are 2 years old, but socially, developmentally, and language wise they are actually 16 to 17 Months old. There teacher told me due to my extended bed rest during my pregnancy with Ellie, that it worsened some of these delays and they had forgotten some of what we had taught them. Hearing this really upset me.

So determined to get the twins back on track I began working with them. We do daily flash cards in the morning, and I use some of there toys to reinforce and incorporate what they learn every day into there playtime.

Well much to my excitement, this morning while I was eating breakfast and blogging Mathias who was sitting across from me at our dinning room table suddenly blurted out Moo..... Intially thinking it was Elijah I looked over to see not Mathias playing with the little people cows, but Mathias. He was lining the cows up at the table. He Moved the cow back and forth and again blurted out Moo. I watched him for a few minutes and along with his Moo came a Na as he moved the little people horse back and forth like he had done with the cow. I was so excited I snapped photos of him playing. Ha our Goo said "moo". One step closer to being back on track.

Lights, Camera, Bathtime!!!!!

Ellie's 1st bath was a very long awaited event. Because of a belly button that bleed forever after her umbilical cord coming and having 3 other kids we didn't get to bathe her as early as we had wanted. Lets just say getting to this event could of easily been a whole theatrical event. Note the lights, camera, action title to the blog. But our reward for waiting was that Ellie did wonderfully during her bath. I think she had to practice for her big moment. But it went over with out much crying. The initial dunk in the water startled her and she cried for a brief moment. But after that she seemed to enjoy it and be a natural born water baby. It was a delightful experience for Ellie and us. I even think I heard Josh sniffling in the back ground as I was bathing her, not sure though as he was hiding behind the camera.

Drying off went almost as well with very little crying and lots of being awake. Other then a few shivers it went well also.

The end result was like a lot like the prior sponge baths, A wonderful smelling beautiful baby girl, whose hair later fluffed up like a poodles cut or a very distasteful hair do. Note the fluffy hair looks marvelous on her. The other perk to this long production is that our main actor
" slept like a baby".